This week, I'm watching movies that everyone else my age has seen and loves. Okay, I may never have seen Almost Famous, but at least I've seen a lot of musicals from the first year of talkies. And a pretty good selection of rotten horror flicks that are only available on VHS. So there!
Anyway, everybody loves Almost Famous, right? I understand there's a scene where a number of people sing an Elton John song on a bus, and it's very emotionally affecting. Going into the movie, I really only know "Tiny Dancer" as the theme song to my old Bar Trivia team. Good times.
Your first question is why I never saw it. Well, I don't know. I like Cameron Crowe okay. I even like Lester Bangs, although I think his writing was a bad influence on generations of pop culture writers who confused attitude with talent. Also, I'm pretty sure he thought it was funny to take some terrible piece of crap band and make them sound like the coolest thing in the world just to see if he could make people buy the record. Don't get me wrong; he was a great writer, it's just that -- actually, I could go on for quite some time about Lester Bangs, and this is about Almost Famous. Which I've never seen. Until today.
I did try watching the DVD once a couple of years ago, but I only got about twenty minutes in before I got bored and antsy and turned it off. It was when Kate Hudson first showed up. I remember I found her first couple of lines as the groupie to be intensely annoying.
This turns out not to have been a fluke: I still find her insufferably obnoxious. I could do with a good deal less of her. She's trying way too hard. She's completely fake. And maybe it's the character that's trying too hard, not the actress. That happens sometimes. But everyone in the movie finds her adorable and magnetic and fantastic, which does not match my personal reaction, which is basically "Why would anyone spend time with this person?" Frankly, I did not find her to be a blithe free spirit, flitting hither and yon and bestowing magical fairy dust on every scene. Or whatever it is people see in her. Even in her big scenes, she doesn't work for me.
You know what she's like? Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. The Aaron Sorkin show that wasn't anywhere near as interesting as 30 Rock? Everyone on that show acted like the show-within-a-show was brilliant and groundbreaking, but we could clearly tell that it was awful, because it turns out that while Aaron Sorkin can write dialogue like nobody's business, he can't write a convincing sketch comedy show. Penny Lane is like that. The character I see and the character the rest of the movie sees are severely at odds. And I don't think it's on purpose.
I did enjoy the movie as a whole, though. The non-groupie parts of it. It's fun to have a movie that hides everyone under silly Seventies wigs and facial hair so every new character comes with thirty seconds of "...that guy sounds really familiar. Who is that? Is that ... Jimmy Fallon? I think it is!" And it's just enough of a period piece that parts of it feel quaint. Like, remember when bands didn't get their first T-shirt until after they'd already opened for Black Sabbath and went on a tour? These days, you print up your first shirts on CafePress five minutes after you settle on a band name.
Incidentally, almost the first shot is in Balboa Park, driving past the Museum of Man. I approve of movies that feature Balboa Park. Although the only other one I can think of is Citizen Kane, which uses it for the exteriors of Xanadu (the stately home of Charles Foster Kane) in the newsreel at the beginning.
Oh: The "Tiny Dancer" scene works. Darned if I know why, though. Cameron Crowe's good at putting songs to scenes, is my theory.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Saturday Schlock
What's better on a Saturday afternoon and evening than curling up on the couch with your loved one and watching a bunch of terrible movies? Nothing! So here's what we watched:
Escape 2000
This movie is really called “Turkey Shoot”. That’s the name it was originally shown under in Australia, and it’s the name in the movie when you watch the DVD. But it was released in the US as “Escape 2000”, and that’s a more Postapocalytipcal title. Seriously, there are like ten movies set “after the apocalypse” that have “2000” in the title.
It’s a prime example of Ozsploitation, which means that it’s full of things that people in 1980s Australia thought of. Like, it’s mostly a story of people stuck in a futuristic reeducation camp, but for some reason there’s a werewolf-mutant guy. He seems pretty well-mannered, though. His name is Alf. His presence doesn’t make any sense.
About half of the movie is the “turkey shoot” of the title. Well, one of the titles. The main four prisoners are set free to get chased by the sadistic weirdoes that run the camp, and a couple of them manage to kill their pursuers and get back to the camp. Then they kill about a hundred and fifty guards with machine guns and bazookas, which should certainly prove that they shouldn’t have been put in a prison for antisocial behavior. Then that Australian army bombs the whole camp, I guess.
Slithis
Okay. It’s sort of like The Host, in that it’s about a monster created by toxic waste. Except that it’s made incredibly amateurishly and contains approximately zero actors. Some of them, like this one policeman in a house, sound like they’ve learned their lines phonetically. And this other guy, who plays the chief of police (I think; I wasn’t paying that much attention until he showed up) puts in the most over-the-top performance in the history of “Trolls Under the Bridge: The Troll Story”. He’s got some sort of fake British accent going on, but it’s a lot like the Wayne’s World imitation of Leprechaun.
Slaughterhouse Rock
This starts with two “Omigosh it was only a dream!” scenes in a row. Awesome. And then it fills the rest of the movie with Horrible Visions by the main character. These Visions are accompanied by extremely shrill noises that require the television to be turned down. Anyway, they eventually lead Dull Main Guy and his pals Fratboy Jerks 1-3 and Vapid Screaming Girls 1-4 to sneak into Alcatraz and battle demons with the help of the ghost of a murdered heavy metal singer played by Toni Basil.
We got bored and didn’t finish watching it. Sorry.
The Terrornauts
This had a terrific trailer on the latest 42nd Street Forever collection. You know, the Alamo Drafthouse one. So we watched the movie, and it turns out not to be worth it. It’s one of those really boring British science fiction movies from the late sixties where a bunch of stodgy scientists stand around on one set for an hour talking about what it might look like if they actually travelled to another planet. When it eventually happens, the highlights are:
A) A crudely constructed robot covered in about twenty heating vents, and
B) A ridiculous alien that turns out to be an illusion.
Aside from that, strictly boresville, Daddy-O.
Escape 2000
This movie is really called “Turkey Shoot”. That’s the name it was originally shown under in Australia, and it’s the name in the movie when you watch the DVD. But it was released in the US as “Escape 2000”, and that’s a more Postapocalytipcal title. Seriously, there are like ten movies set “after the apocalypse” that have “2000” in the title.
It’s a prime example of Ozsploitation, which means that it’s full of things that people in 1980s Australia thought of. Like, it’s mostly a story of people stuck in a futuristic reeducation camp, but for some reason there’s a werewolf-mutant guy. He seems pretty well-mannered, though. His name is Alf. His presence doesn’t make any sense.
About half of the movie is the “turkey shoot” of the title. Well, one of the titles. The main four prisoners are set free to get chased by the sadistic weirdoes that run the camp, and a couple of them manage to kill their pursuers and get back to the camp. Then they kill about a hundred and fifty guards with machine guns and bazookas, which should certainly prove that they shouldn’t have been put in a prison for antisocial behavior. Then that Australian army bombs the whole camp, I guess.
Slithis
Okay. It’s sort of like The Host, in that it’s about a monster created by toxic waste. Except that it’s made incredibly amateurishly and contains approximately zero actors. Some of them, like this one policeman in a house, sound like they’ve learned their lines phonetically. And this other guy, who plays the chief of police (I think; I wasn’t paying that much attention until he showed up) puts in the most over-the-top performance in the history of “Trolls Under the Bridge: The Troll Story”. He’s got some sort of fake British accent going on, but it’s a lot like the Wayne’s World imitation of Leprechaun.
Slaughterhouse Rock
This starts with two “Omigosh it was only a dream!” scenes in a row. Awesome. And then it fills the rest of the movie with Horrible Visions by the main character. These Visions are accompanied by extremely shrill noises that require the television to be turned down. Anyway, they eventually lead Dull Main Guy and his pals Fratboy Jerks 1-3 and Vapid Screaming Girls 1-4 to sneak into Alcatraz and battle demons with the help of the ghost of a murdered heavy metal singer played by Toni Basil.
We got bored and didn’t finish watching it. Sorry.
The Terrornauts
This had a terrific trailer on the latest 42nd Street Forever collection. You know, the Alamo Drafthouse one. So we watched the movie, and it turns out not to be worth it. It’s one of those really boring British science fiction movies from the late sixties where a bunch of stodgy scientists stand around on one set for an hour talking about what it might look like if they actually travelled to another planet. When it eventually happens, the highlights are:
A) A crudely constructed robot covered in about twenty heating vents, and
B) A ridiculous alien that turns out to be an illusion.
Aside from that, strictly boresville, Daddy-O.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Texting During Hackers
I was in Austin a week or so ago, which meant that I got to see movies at the Alamo Drafthouse. I'll watch practically anything there! And I'll also watch Hackers at practically any moment. So imagine my delight when I realized I was going to get to see a special showing of Hackers at the Alamo Drafthouse! Seriously, go ahead and imagine it. I'll wait.
Of course, most people have to be in the right mood to see Hackers. They need some sort of excuse or something. I don't know why. Maybe they just want to limit their exposure to things that are fun. The Drafthouse was going with a weird gimmick: members of the audience would send text messages that would appear on the screen. It's like everybody shouting during a movie, but quieter and nerdier.
Sooooo anyway, here are the things I texted during the movie.
Featuring a star of Sports Night! -- this is because Felicity Huffman plays the prosecuting attorney at the beginning of the movie. Who doesn't like Felicity Huffman?
Poor Dade
The movie begins and ends in an airplane -- Actually, I guess it's the second scene and third-from-last scene. I still think it's interesting to have an airplane scene sort of bookending the action.
NORM! -- I have no idea why I texted this. I assume there was a fat guy on screen.
The challenge is clearly to text far enough in advance that it makes sense when it finally shows up. -- there was a lot of lag at this point, because the automatic system was slowing down the texts, so you didn'treally know when the queue would show yours.
College is the secret theme of this movie. That and the word ELITE -- It's true. Dade's motivation is apparently "get into college", while Joey's is "become ELITE"
Snap!
The kid is Bring It On's Jesse Bradford! -- Well, it is.
This is the most realistic depiction of nerds EVER -- You know, with all the leather, latex, and rollerblading.
He just looks slick all day! -- I love this line, which is used to describe a character who promptly vanishes from the movie.
Wow. Normally you have to pull a lever to set off the sprinklers. -- As opposed to Dade's method of elaborately hacking into the school computer.
Those sunglasses are so small! -- Cereal Killer's sunglasses are barely big enough to shade his pupils.
College!
The pink shirt book is just a Peter Norton guide -- Most of the manuals that Cereal Killer uses are, in fact, classically helpful (and taken directly from the Jargon File), but this one is just pointless.
Booooo -- At this point, the movie froze up. Turns out they were using a bad DVD.
So then the kid says he hit a bank, see... -- I was thinking we might just narrate the rest of the movie via the texts.
Hack the Movie! -- The movie's still frozen.
Now no one will see my hilarious jokes about Penn Jillette -- Because we skipped ahead a couple of scenes, which meant that we missed a scene where Penn plays a security guard.
Yay! Numbers!
Hapless technoweenies are the worst kind. -- The Plague calls Penn a "hapless technoweenie", which is a weird way to talk.
Never use your computer without proper eye protection -- Most of the characters (including Penn) are wearing sunglasses whenever they're using a computer. This is so they can have groovy animations projected on their faces.
ELITE
Razor and blade? They're flakes!
This song is not on the soundtrack -- Joey was singing "Wild Child" in the shower. Incidentally, other texts around this point made the argument that Hackers has the worst shower scenes ever.
Ooh! Escalators! Now we're in the future!
Why not talk about our secret plan right here? -- Seriously, they just got out of the big meeting, they're still surrounded by officers, and they just start babbling about the millions of dollars they're stealing?
Nice read, Lorraine -- Lorraine Bracco's read of "Find the file or else you'll lose all your toys" is just awful.
Loyd wrote this manifesto -- Loyd Blankenship, writer of GURPS Cyberpunk.
He doesn't look like a Nirvana fan. -- Dade's got a GIANT Nevermind poster in his room.
The Plague HATES radios! And hard copy.
It ain't a party until the geeks show up!
What about the pooper? -- We skipped another scene when the DVD froze up again. So we missed Cereal Killer's line about "Lookit that pooper!"
WHOOSH! BEEP!
We missed the part where Angelina spraypainted her computer! I love that scene!
Sexay! -- This could have gone almost anywhere, but I wrote it for Acid's dream sequence where she sees Jonny Lee Miller in a latex dress.
Moo?
Now in this scene, I want you to be reaaally annoying...
Phreak doesn't get laid in his dream sequence. -- Doesn't seem fair, really.
It's in that place put that thing that time... That's what she said? -- I'm worried that I've stopped saying "That's what she said" ironically.
Cereal is also a Bible scholar.
I'm threatening you over a wireless headset and open phone line because I'm an elite hacker.
When is the next freezeframe scheduled? -- They were not using a good DVD at all. At the end of the movie, the audience all got free movie passes! Which will come in handy if I get back to Austin in the next year!
This is actually a pretty realistic scene. I mean, look at the pizza boxes! -- This is the scene where the good hackers deconstruct the virus/worm. It's realistic, I tell you! Look past the graphics!
Fractally!
They care more about Dade getting into college than the inevitable jail time
Erotically, as it were
She coulda killed that guy! -- Seriously, you can't just shoot a a flare gun at some guy doing his job!
Great. Lillard's butt. Thanks, movie.
Nice tape machine from the 1930s.
Couldn't they theoretically be elite flakes? -- Razor and Blade, that is.
I hate these movies that cast Asian actors in whiteface. So racist.
I also need an electronic army.
What's a Voodoo People?
Let's commit our federal crime in public! It'll be more ELITE! -- I just think they could have found a better place to work from than the Grand Central Station payphones, is all.
Oh, that Penn! What a technoweenie!
I love the smirk on the Italian guy. Unless he's French. You know, the Euro from five minutes ago when I started typing this.
Nappy: North, up, get egg, down, south, east, open window -- Someone using the handle "Nappy" asked if anyone wanted to play Zork I. I normally grab the egg right away so that I can get it into the treasure case before I attack the troll, since it shortens the fight. Fascinating!
Joey's getting stupid busy! He used to be just stupid.
I am not talking to you, actually.
Arf Arf!
LOLlerblades, actually. -- Someone said the fashion in this movie was "LOLlerskates", see...
Fine, I'll hack the stupid planet already. Get off my back!
A heinous scheme, you say?
Unlucky! -- Lillard's weirdest line reading.
Same jail
Why did they let the plane take off? Did the cops get first class tickets too? -- Seems like a weird way to arrest him. Now they have to go all the way to Tokyo and back.
Wash off some makeup?
So... it was a romance? -- These last scenes don't have much to do with the theme of the movie, in my opinion.
They had to rent an underwater camera for this one scene?
Needed more UNTZ -- Someone was posting UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ every time those songs showed up on the soundtrack.
Play it again!
Of course, most people have to be in the right mood to see Hackers. They need some sort of excuse or something. I don't know why. Maybe they just want to limit their exposure to things that are fun. The Drafthouse was going with a weird gimmick: members of the audience would send text messages that would appear on the screen. It's like everybody shouting during a movie, but quieter and nerdier.
Sooooo anyway, here are the things I texted during the movie.
Featuring a star of Sports Night! -- this is because Felicity Huffman plays the prosecuting attorney at the beginning of the movie. Who doesn't like Felicity Huffman?
Poor Dade
The movie begins and ends in an airplane -- Actually, I guess it's the second scene and third-from-last scene. I still think it's interesting to have an airplane scene sort of bookending the action.
NORM! -- I have no idea why I texted this. I assume there was a fat guy on screen.
The challenge is clearly to text far enough in advance that it makes sense when it finally shows up. -- there was a lot of lag at this point, because the automatic system was slowing down the texts, so you didn'treally know when the queue would show yours.
College is the secret theme of this movie. That and the word ELITE -- It's true. Dade's motivation is apparently "get into college", while Joey's is "become ELITE"
Snap!
The kid is Bring It On's Jesse Bradford! -- Well, it is.
This is the most realistic depiction of nerds EVER -- You know, with all the leather, latex, and rollerblading.
He just looks slick all day! -- I love this line, which is used to describe a character who promptly vanishes from the movie.
Wow. Normally you have to pull a lever to set off the sprinklers. -- As opposed to Dade's method of elaborately hacking into the school computer.
Those sunglasses are so small! -- Cereal Killer's sunglasses are barely big enough to shade his pupils.
College!
The pink shirt book is just a Peter Norton guide -- Most of the manuals that Cereal Killer uses are, in fact, classically helpful (and taken directly from the Jargon File), but this one is just pointless.
Booooo -- At this point, the movie froze up. Turns out they were using a bad DVD.
So then the kid says he hit a bank, see... -- I was thinking we might just narrate the rest of the movie via the texts.
Hack the Movie! -- The movie's still frozen.
Now no one will see my hilarious jokes about Penn Jillette -- Because we skipped ahead a couple of scenes, which meant that we missed a scene where Penn plays a security guard.
Yay! Numbers!
Hapless technoweenies are the worst kind. -- The Plague calls Penn a "hapless technoweenie", which is a weird way to talk.
Never use your computer without proper eye protection -- Most of the characters (including Penn) are wearing sunglasses whenever they're using a computer. This is so they can have groovy animations projected on their faces.
ELITE
Razor and blade? They're flakes!
This song is not on the soundtrack -- Joey was singing "Wild Child" in the shower. Incidentally, other texts around this point made the argument that Hackers has the worst shower scenes ever.
Ooh! Escalators! Now we're in the future!
Why not talk about our secret plan right here? -- Seriously, they just got out of the big meeting, they're still surrounded by officers, and they just start babbling about the millions of dollars they're stealing?
Nice read, Lorraine -- Lorraine Bracco's read of "Find the file or else you'll lose all your toys" is just awful.
Loyd wrote this manifesto -- Loyd Blankenship, writer of GURPS Cyberpunk.
He doesn't look like a Nirvana fan. -- Dade's got a GIANT Nevermind poster in his room.
The Plague HATES radios! And hard copy.
It ain't a party until the geeks show up!
What about the pooper? -- We skipped another scene when the DVD froze up again. So we missed Cereal Killer's line about "Lookit that pooper!"
WHOOSH! BEEP!
We missed the part where Angelina spraypainted her computer! I love that scene!
Sexay! -- This could have gone almost anywhere, but I wrote it for Acid's dream sequence where she sees Jonny Lee Miller in a latex dress.
Moo?
Now in this scene, I want you to be reaaally annoying...
Phreak doesn't get laid in his dream sequence. -- Doesn't seem fair, really.
It's in that place put that thing that time... That's what she said? -- I'm worried that I've stopped saying "That's what she said" ironically.
Cereal is also a Bible scholar.
I'm threatening you over a wireless headset and open phone line because I'm an elite hacker.
When is the next freezeframe scheduled? -- They were not using a good DVD at all. At the end of the movie, the audience all got free movie passes! Which will come in handy if I get back to Austin in the next year!
This is actually a pretty realistic scene. I mean, look at the pizza boxes! -- This is the scene where the good hackers deconstruct the virus/worm. It's realistic, I tell you! Look past the graphics!
Fractally!
They care more about Dade getting into college than the inevitable jail time
Erotically, as it were
She coulda killed that guy! -- Seriously, you can't just shoot a a flare gun at some guy doing his job!
Great. Lillard's butt. Thanks, movie.
Nice tape machine from the 1930s.
Couldn't they theoretically be elite flakes? -- Razor and Blade, that is.
I hate these movies that cast Asian actors in whiteface. So racist.
I also need an electronic army.
What's a Voodoo People?
Let's commit our federal crime in public! It'll be more ELITE! -- I just think they could have found a better place to work from than the Grand Central Station payphones, is all.
Oh, that Penn! What a technoweenie!
I love the smirk on the Italian guy. Unless he's French. You know, the Euro from five minutes ago when I started typing this.
Nappy: North, up, get egg, down, south, east, open window -- Someone using the handle "Nappy" asked if anyone wanted to play Zork I. I normally grab the egg right away so that I can get it into the treasure case before I attack the troll, since it shortens the fight. Fascinating!
Joey's getting stupid busy! He used to be just stupid.
I am not talking to you, actually.
Arf Arf!
LOLlerblades, actually. -- Someone said the fashion in this movie was "LOLlerskates", see...
Fine, I'll hack the stupid planet already. Get off my back!
A heinous scheme, you say?
Unlucky! -- Lillard's weirdest line reading.
Same jail
Why did they let the plane take off? Did the cops get first class tickets too? -- Seems like a weird way to arrest him. Now they have to go all the way to Tokyo and back.
Wash off some makeup?
So... it was a romance? -- These last scenes don't have much to do with the theme of the movie, in my opinion.
They had to rent an underwater camera for this one scene?
Needed more UNTZ -- Someone was posting UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ every time those songs showed up on the soundtrack.
Play it again!
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Whip It Plus Five
Before we start, I should mention that I was a scorekeeper for the Rat City Rollergirls for a season. So I might possibly be biased in favor of a movie about roller derby. And I did enjoy it, although I admit that it was awfully formulaic. Between the trailer and my knowledge of How Sports Movies Work, there weren't that many surprises to be had. But who cares when I can watch Zoe Bell being a roller derby girl?I was also predisposed to like it because it's set in Austin (well, mostly) and I'm going there in a week. So I was already pleased about going to see movies at the Alamo Drafthouse, and now I got to see a movie with the Drafthouse in it! So that was cool.
I don't really have much else to say about Whip It, since it was a straightforward fun movie. I don't feel like dissecting it or anything. Although I did feel that it was inappropriate for a seventeen-year-old character to make out with someone who thought she was 22. And if making out was all they did, I'd be very surprised. Anyway! Here are five other movies you might like if you liked Whip It!
5. The Fireball (1950)
Mickey Rooney is an orphan with a bad attitude who discovers a natural aptitude for speed skating. So, just like Bliss in Whip It, he immediately becomes great at roller derby. But this is back in 1950, when derby was a national sport, so he becomes a massive star and develops an even worse attitude. Then he gets polio (!), recovers, and makes an inspirational return to the track, all while being a huge egotistical jerk.
4. Double Dare (2004)
Zoe Bell plays Bloody Holly in Whip It, and she's a lot of fun to watch. You might recognize her from the Death Proof half of Grindhouse, but I recommend this 2004 documentary, which splits its time between two stuntwomen: Zoe Bell (who did Xena's stunts, which means all that flippy-flippy was her) and Jeannie Epper (a million roles in the Old Days, including doing Lynda Carter's stunts in "Wonder Woman"). This movie is why I spent so much of Whip It watching a character with very few lines.
3. Unholy Rollers (1972)
Roller Derby sort of comes and goes, you know? This is from the Seventies version of derby, and it's kind of like Flashdance. Except instead of being a steelworker, Claudia Jennings works in a cannery, and instead of becoming a Flashdancer, she becomes a roller derby skater. Then all the usual things happen, but it's entertaining anyway.
2. The Demon of the Derby (2001)
Ann Calvello was a tough old broad who skated in the Very Old Days of roller derby. She dyed her hair crazy colors and gleefully played the bad guy. She was awesome. This documentary is from when she was even older, but no less tough. It makes a great double feature with Lipstick and Dynamite, about the tough old broads from the old days of women's wrestling.
1. Kansas City Bomber (1972)
This is probably the best roller derby movie. It's got Raquel Welch! And some of the same background skaters as Unholy Rollers, so you can learn all about the standard Roller Derby Moves from back then. You know, like the Double Clothesline and the, um, Hop Up and Down on One Leg for Half a Lap!
Monday, September 28, 2009
On Stranger Tides? Yes, please!
It appears that the full title of the next Pirates of the Caribbean movie is "Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides".
I mention this because On Stranger Tides is a book by Tim Powers of which I am very fond. It's got pirates and voodoo and magic and would fit very well into the world of the PotC movies. It's even set in the Caribbean! What more do you want?
I admit that I'm not sure how they're going to shoehorn Cap'n Jack Sparrow into things, but I'm willing to keep an open mind. A big-budget Tim Powers movie is Huge News in my world.
I mention this because On Stranger Tides is a book by Tim Powers of which I am very fond. It's got pirates and voodoo and magic and would fit very well into the world of the PotC movies. It's even set in the Caribbean! What more do you want?
I admit that I'm not sure how they're going to shoehorn Cap'n Jack Sparrow into things, but I'm willing to keep an open mind. A big-budget Tim Powers movie is Huge News in my world.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Astro Boy Commercials
The first line of the commercials for Astro Boy is "He was a robot ... who wanted to become a real boy."
What? A robot who wants to a real boy? I've never heard of such a thing! How are we to cope with such a shockingly original plot?
Or, to quote the noted robot expert Joel Robinson, "Oh, Tom Servo, you've got Pinocchio syndrome!"
Sheesh.
(EDIT: It says in that TV Tropes link that "Astro Boy is perhaps the oldest anime expression of this trope." Canonical or not, it's still boring)
What? A robot who wants to a real boy? I've never heard of such a thing! How are we to cope with such a shockingly original plot?
Or, to quote the noted robot expert Joel Robinson, "Oh, Tom Servo, you've got Pinocchio syndrome!"
Sheesh.
(EDIT: It says in that TV Tropes link that "Astro Boy is perhaps the oldest anime expression of this trope." Canonical or not, it's still boring)
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Fame (the 2009 one)
I enjoyed the new Fame remake, although mostly for the things that reminded me of the original. I've seen the original a lot, and I kept thinking, "Oh boy! This is where the character considers suicide in the subway!"First of all, the high school portrayed in the movie has the best faculty in the country. These kids are being taught by Debbie Allen, Charles S. Dutton, Megan Mullally, Kelsey Grammer, and Bebe Neuwerth! Incidentally, would it have killed them to put Kelsey Grammer and Bebe Neuwerth on the screen at the same time? I demand my Frasier-Lilith reunion!
The new movie is set in a cleaner, nicer New York. Which I guess is accurate, because 1980 Manhattan was a lot grosser than the one we have in 2009. The kids are also more advanced; a big moment in the original movie was when two of them went to the Rocky Horror Picture Show but this movie has someone use part of that movie as her audition monologue. She actually does a really good job with it. Better than Little Nell did, anyway (it's the part where Columbia yells at Frank right before being turned to stone).
The main Mousy Girl didn't do much for me. They established her hangups and limitations early on, but we don't really get anything later on to show that she's learned to act. She just gets a progressively more mature hairstyle. The feeling of learning and maturing is definitely something that's missing from the movie. The character who starts out as an immature dancer is the one who ends up being told he's not a very good dancer. The dancer who starts out awesome (Kherington Payne from So You Think You Can Dance) pretty much stays awesome. And so on.
Anyway, my main problem with it was that it just didn't feel as real as the original. I put in my time at the San Diego Junior Theatre, and the background action in the 1980 version rang true in a way that it doesn't in this one. Also, because it's PG, I would occasionally think "Uh oh, is she going to get raped? No, I guess she isn't. Never mind."
Also, the songs weren't as good. And they were very on-the-nose, what with the lyrics about "be true to yourself" and "success is about succeeding, not being famous".
But like I say, I still enjoyed it.
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